Wednesday, October 22, 2008

NewBorn Care Class

Given that we are so close to having our baby but that neither Scott nor I have ever changed a diaper before, we thought it would be a good idea to go to a General Newborn Care class at the local hospital.

Clearly, we needed some help.

We got to practice giving a baby a bath and of course changing a poopy diaper. It was too funny when Scott opened up the diaper on the doll baby to find a big gooey mess down there... but we learned that changing a diaper is really no big deal because the baby sits still and quiet the whole time no matter how long you take. And who knew that baby poop smells like chocolate frosting?

This is gonna be a cinch.

We also learned the five full-proof ways to calm a fussy baby. You see, babies have a 'calming reflex' so all you have to do is: 1) Swaddle them tightly, 2) hold them on their Side, 3) give a good Shhhhh, 4) Swing 'em around a bit, 5) and let 'em Suck. Works every time. Right, Kelley? ;)

Seriously though, I think some of the info in this class was great, and overall we both thought it was well worth our time. My only complaint is that the instructor is the most opinionated and judgemental woman either of us had ever met (the same self-proclained Birth Goddess who taught us the Birthing Basics Class last month). I understand that she teaches the teen pregnancy classes at Kailua High School, so she feels like she needs to impart all of her infallible wisdom on the naive kids who are having kids, but it seems to me that maybe her style should change a bit when she's working with a room full of educated adults.

I think I'm a pretty open-minded person and take pride in the fact that I will listen to many different view points (and make it a priority to search out such things), but that in the end I will make choices based on what makes most sense to me. And in all my recent research on methods of dealing with babies, I have found many differing (opposite?) approaches and philosophies. And some woman in particular seem to get so wrapped up in and convinced that their method is unequivocally the best and only way to do it...

I think anyone who proclaims to know it all is full of it.

Anyway, the Birth Goddess apparently plays some role at the hospital where I'll be delivering (not sure how exactly she participates?) but I told Scott that his job while we're there is going to be to keep this woman away from me.

7 comments:

Frayed Laces said...

hahahahaha this post was hilarious! You MUST save that picture of scott and show it to Cervelo when it is older.

Clare said...

i was wondering if we should go to that class too...i was also wondering if you can go AFTER you realize you're clueless...if the kid is not permanently damaged by then of course...

N.D. said...

ahah, very cute!

Angela and David Kidd said...

I thought the 5 S's were a bunch of crap but they actually work. When the baby is screaming you will try ANYTHING.

Newt said...

Love the pic :)

We start those classes next month. I think Mr. Newt is dreading them, but maybe he'll perk up when I tell him there are dolls and frosting. Sounds like a frat party.

IVF Running Mama said...

Chocolate icing...yummy....

Alicia Parr said...

If you think chocolate frosting is sticky and gooey, what till you get a load of that meconium stuff. Load. Ha ha.