Sunday, June 27, 2010

I Will Live To Fight Another Day

I'm not going to write up a play by play about today because honestly, I don't really want to re-live it.

Suffice to say, I woke up this morning with that 'sick taste' in my throat and deep down in my heart knew thy today was not going to be my day. You just can't race flat out for 5 hours when you're not 100% healthy. I really did just try to ignore it... Just wanted my body to hang in there for a few more hours before submitting to whatever virus was trying to attack me... I tried to will myself to be strong...

But when 3 women passed me in the first 5 miles of the bike I knew I was in trouble. Then 3 more passed me in the next 5 miles. Seriously? I had nothing. Just could.not.respond. I knew my race was over At that point but did the best I could to keep moving forward until I got to the finish line.

I was disappointed of course. It was not my day. I had a major mental battle with myself for 2+ hours on that run course. Being pissed and feeling all sorry for myself and not caring at all anymore and all that. And then I'd see a guy in a wheelchair competing in the hand cycle division and tell myself to get over myself. "Quit your bitching Michelle. You have two working legs (sort of lol) and you don't have cancer..."

Anyway, it didn't take me too long to get over my irritation about it all. I came here with hopes to get a kona spot but looking at the results it was clear to me that even on my best most awesome super stellar day, I would not be in the same league as those girls who won. Top 2 in my age group were top 2 amateur overall and I'm just flat out not that fast. Honestly, its kind of a relief that 2nd place wasn't like 5:05 because then I would leave here thinking, "If only I would have been healthy..." At this point there are no 'what ifs' so its all fine.

I'm still super glad I came though! Try, the BEST part of my weekend was hanging out with Angela Kidd and being there when she accepted her Kona spot. It was awesome!! Angela and I hit it off exactly as I thought we would... She is one of my favorite bloggers and we've been reading each others blogs since we were pregnant. In fact, knowing that she was going to be in Lubbock this weekend helped seal my own decision to come... It was super hard for me not to blog about her being here since she was all Slim Shady about her trip here. That's her new nickname by the way. :)

Ok, I have not yet packed my bike. Ugh. And can I tell you how much I'm looking forward to traveling again all day tomorrow? I'm guessing that my severly compromised immune system + a full day of travel = a full on bout of bronchitis. Lovely.

I'll write another post about this later, but I have to say, Buffalo Springs 70.3 is a great race. Super competitive (that is an understatement) but well run and honest (except for the super short wetsuit legal 82 degree water swim).

14 comments:

cherelli said...

hey Michelle, sorry to hear your last minute race plans didn't pay off, but hey at least you gave it a shot. Neat that you were there to meet Angela - and see her get a Kona spot. Enjoy letting the immune system recover :)

Teresa said...

Michelle I am proud of you for giving your best on your "not so best" day. These days make you stronger and are all part of the journey....we all know what you are capable of "speedy"!

tn

Running and living said...

I agree, Michelle, your AG was crazy competitive. OMG. I think the toughest races are those when you realize early on that you can't meet your goal; the mental battles are horrendous, and it is hard to even finish (I had this at Boston this year). But, you did your best on a day when your body did not cooperate! So I say, good job. Now do some of Angela's tricks to get healthy:)

Allison Chapple said...

Oh man. What a disappointment. I guess it's impossible to have stellar races 100% of the time but it's no less crappy to not perform up to expectations.

Glad you got to hang out with Angela! She's great.

Clare said...

bummer. i was so confused when i saw angela's FB picture of YOU drinking a margarita, but it all makes sense now!

N.D. said...

sorry it wasn't your day! :( Way to make it through it and finish it out.

Rebecca DeWire said...

Your AG was insanely competitive. Sorry to hear that you didn't have your best race. But how cool that you got to hang out with Angela!

GoBigGreen said...

Michelle-way to keep your chin up and soldier forward despite feeling like crud:( travel can wear you down as you know so stay away from the mainland for a bit :) and rest up at home. Glad you had fun with jh's girls!

Lizzie said...

Ugh - I hate those races . .. especially when you shrug it off in the beginning and it becomes more obvious as you go along. But the fact that you were even there and still racing says more about your amazing character than anything else! Hope your trip home today is a speedy one -and some Moana kisses and hugs will help you feel better!

X-Country2 said...

Way to gut it out. I still think you're a mega rockstar. :o) Safe travels back home!

Trisaratops said...

So sorry to hear it wasn't your day. Hope you feel better soon! Way to finish a tough race.

Regina said...

I still think it's amazing you went out and competed anyway and still got a great time. And whatever you lack on the run you sure as hell had in the swim. You are freaking fast. I think you had a better pace than than most of the pro women. That is pretty awesome.

Kim said...

holy competitive! way to hang in there michelle and still throw down a great strong race.

Big Daddy Diesel said...

I know exactly how you felt racing under the weather, having nothing to counter an attack, at least you finished, that more then alot of people could have said. Congrats