I got in the pool this morning and started warming up and the piano fell on my back after about 50M. Sweet. It was going to be one of those workouts... Which was a bummer b/c this was supposed to be a good hard one and I had been looking forward to it. Sort of.
I kept the w/u pretty mellow and then we got into the long main set and I was just off the back right away and thinking whatever. Just get through this one. Or maybe I should get out? Should I get out? No. Stay in and do it but just let it go that it's just going to be a shitty day.
As the meters dragged on my thoughts evolved. I didn't say any of this out loud but all this was going through my head this morning...
This sucks. I am just too tired. I should know that if I want to swim well on Friday morning I can't do a w/o like I did Thursday afternoon... and Wednesday... and Tuesday... So much fatigue. Ugh. Mark and Steve don't have this fatigue b/c all they do is swim. Losers. I should swim by myself more. Seriously, they have no idea what it feels like to actually be tired. I need to eat more. Ugh. Am I going to get my period soon? I bet I am and that's why I'm being so pissy. Oh that would suck. Honu is 4 weeks away and if I'm going to get it now then I'll be PMSing at Honu. That sucks. Seriously I have just not fueled enough this week. So.much.fatigue. Damn Mark is all peppy. Whatever. Should I start resting soon? Feeling like this sucks... I must be PMSing.
So there I was swimming off the back with all those negative thoughts in my head. I wasn't speaking to anyone at the wall except to say "5 seconds..." and then we'd just go again. It wasn't very much fun.
And then, 2600M into the swim, I told my bitchy self to SHUT UP and I started SWIMMING. Nalani and Mark noticed right away b/c I was actually swimming next to them instead of 1/2 a pool behind them... Nalani was like "Michelle is warmed up now!" But it wasn't about being warmed up. It was about getting over myself, shutting out the negative thoughts and doing WORK. I jammed through the rest of the main set (which was only like 1200M but still) and even started goading Mark on (which was way more fun than just being a bitch in my own head)!
I think the biggest take-away for me today was that it is indeed possible to turn around your shitty attitude mid-workout. I've known for quite some time that especially when it comes to swimming, whether or not I swim fast is completely dependent on whether or not I decide I'm going to swim fast. I know it's all in my head. But typically the way that works is I decide on my mind-set (consciously or unconsciously) prior to starting the swim and then it is what it is and the whole w/o goes that way. Today was the first time I've managed to turn it around in the midst of it. Valuable lesson to put in our pockets!