Inspired

I don't know if any of you followed the IronmanLive.com coverage of IM Louisville today, but I found it pretty inspiring.

Originally, I logged on to watch how Hawaii's Pro triathlete Bree Wee was doing... She was going for her spot to Kona and it looked great for her for a while (she was winning for several hours!)... but Ironmans are hard. And sometimes, for a whole host of possible reasons, your body just doesn't want to give anymore. That must have happened to Bree today during the run. I think it would/will happen to anyone at some point if you do enough Ironmans. I've certainly been there (a couple of times!)... I think I even remember a particular meltdown during Ironman Brazil a couple of years ago where I was thinking to myself, "Maybe I'll just get married and have kids and live a normal life so I don't have to do this anymore..." Ha! Look at me now... but I digress...

At one point the live coverage said something about how 3 of the current top 5 pro women were moms. Bree is a mom of a 2 yr old, Heather Gollnick has 3 kids, and Lisbeth Kristensen gave birth just 8 months ago! That means that last year at this time she was all big and pregnant... a physical state I am totally familiar with now. Anyway, thinking about the comeback that Kristensen made this past year after giving birth totally inspired me. Not that I'm a pro (or ever will even come close!), but more along the idea that you can get right back to your pre-preggo state soon enough if you work at it. I think all of us who are pregnant and experiencing the joys of "Wow, how cool that my body knows how to create a whole new little life!" and yet at the same time, "Gosh my butt is getting bigger everyday... will it ever be normal again?" can appreciate the accomplishment of Kristensen today (she placed 3rd among the women). By the way, even with her meltdown on the run, Bree still fought back to finish and placed 9th. Amazing.

Anyway, I'd like to offer a heartfelt congrats to all the moms who did that Ironman today. I look forward to one day carrying my kid(s) across the finish line of an Ironman.

Dear Bikes,

Dear Bikes,

I know it's another Saturday morning and you are stuck inside doing nothing. I'm sorry these last 7 months have been so boring for you. I know that you have been sitting there patiently, only to collect dust while the spider webs form and the air slowly deflated out of your tires. Please don't be mad at me. There's a good reason why we're taking this break.

I hope the bath you all got yesterday was somewhat uplifting and encouraging. I just want to promise that you will have more opportunities to go out and play soon... Just a couple more months and we'll be out on the roads again together... reforming our old bond...

Love,

Michelle

BabyProofing Your Marriage, Part 3

Mama Simmons is back again with another installment of BabyProofing Your Marriage. The first and second posts can be found in the August blog archives, in case you didn't read them the first time around. :)This chapter deals with Intimacy in a marriage (or lack thereof) after children enter the picture. In an effort to keep my blog G-Rated, I'm not going to go into deep detail here, which also might give you a good reason to actually go out and buy the book... In fact it might be worth buying and reading for this chapter alone...

But the quick summary goes something like this. In most cases, intimacy between marriage partners takes a big hit after kids enter the picture. Several reasons for this (from the woman's point of view) include:

1. I'm. So. Tired. Been up most of the night dealing with hungry/fussy baby. For 2 months in a row.

2. I feel fat. Case closed.

3. All day long I've been dealing with all the household chores and then with all the baby peeing and pooping and spitting up and I didn't even have time to wash the vomit out of my hair... not feeling so sexy.

4. A woman's biological need at this time is NOT to procreate again. In fact, her biological need is to make sure that this one baby can survive on its own before she puts herself in a position where she might end up having to care for another one.

Men, on the other hand, don't experience this biological shift, they don't think we're fat, and they don't understand how tired we are. Why can't things just be normal like they used to be? What about his needs? (By the way, this is where men get the upper hand on Keeping Score.)

Which leads us to another point... What about his needs? There's a helpless baby in the other room and you better bet that when it cries, it doesn't matter how tired we mommies are, we'll find a way to muster the energy to attend to its needs. Babies need us. Grown men can take care of themselves, can't they?

Turns out, not if you want a happy marriage.

Don't ignore this part, ladies. Besides making everyone happy, you just might find that a little skip in his step will lead him to taking the garbage out and fixing the broken light and maybe, just maybe, helping you fold a load of laundry. Don't doubt your ability to become the wife he sees as a goddess...

A few years ago, I saw an episode of Oprah where the guest was a woman who wrote a somewhat controversial book* on putting her relationship with her husband above her relationship with her kids... She made it clear that she loved her kids dearly, but that she loved her husband more, and that her relationship with him came first. Her thought was that by showing her kids a healthy, strong, loving relationship between parents, she was teaching them a valuable life lesson while at the same time allowing them to feel secure that their parents were one strong unit. Made total sense to me, but I swear, this woman got boo'd by the audience of moms repeatedly. Like she was a bad mom for not putting her children first... So I'm not sure where the balance is, but I don't think that kids benefit when their parents aren't in a loving relationship with each other, so whatever priorities we need to set to make that happen are going to be key.

Finally, don't forget the Small Gestures of Intimacy like holding hands, hugging, and kissing that can be left by the wayside when we're swamped with other priorities. You don't want to wake up one day and realize that you've been "running a small nursery with someone you used to date"...

*If anyone knows what book I'm talking about, please let me know. I saw the Oprah episode years ago when the thought of having kids wasn't even on my radar so I never did really look into finding the book. But I'd love to read it now..

Animal House Update, According to Monti

Dear Mom, (Ellen in Kuwait)

How's it going over there in the war zone? I hear you have to go outside to go to the bathroom... Welcome to my world.

So far things are going pretty well in this new house I'm staying at while you're gone. There's another cat who isn't really all that friendly. I try to play with her sometimes but she hisses a lot. Not sure that she enjoys playing like I do, but maybe she'll come around. I'm working on her. I mean, she's ok. We share the litter boxes and our food just fine but she doesn't seem to like it when I try to curl up next to her to take a nap. She always hisses and runs away. Go figure.

There's a big black dog too. At first I was afraid because she barked at me a lot. Really loudly. I couldn't even move in this house without the dog being alerted to my position. Being stalked wasn't a lot of fun. But lately I've turned the tables on her. I figured out that her bark may be loud but she doesn't bite. So since the other cat won't play with me, I've started playing this little game with the dog. I run, she chases. Then I'll stop suddenly and roll over onto my back so I can swat her in the face when she gets close. Ha! So much fun.

I also make sure that the dog doesn't sleep too much. I wait until she's in a deep sleep (she snores so it's easy to tell) and then I walk right by her and meow as seductively as I can. No matter what doggie is dreaming about, she'll get up and follow me around. I kind of like having a shadow all the time.

I've had some good adventures exploring every inch of this house. It's cool I guess. I like jumping up onto the roof outside from the back patio.

For my next adventure I'm going to figure out a way to sneak out the front door. I see the Woman Who Swallowed a Basketball and the guy who pets me all the time go out that door everyday. And doggie goes too... and she always seems so excited about it when she gets to go. There must be something awesome out there. I've tried a couple times already to sneak out, but the Woman Who Swallowed a Basketball always stops me. One of these days I'll go for the Great Escape so I can explore the Land Beyond the Front Door.

Anyway, mom, stay safe out there in Kuwait and don't worry about me. I'm doing fine. When are you coming home?

Love, Monti

Lucky I Live Hawaii

What a cool day. This morning I went down to the beach for my workout. Swam for about 15 minutes down the bouy line, then spent about 40 minutes deep water running while watching numerous kayakers, windsurfers, and kite boarders do their thing before swimming back to my starting place. Workouts just don't get much more enjoyable than that. The beach was full of moms and babies, dogs playing in the waves, people exercising and running (or just lounging and reading a book under a shade tree)... I couldn't help but think how lucky I am to be living here and how lucky our little kid is going to be to get to grow up here!

After a quick outdoor shower I headed over for my monthly prenatal check-up. Scott always meets me there (my MD is about a block down the road from his office). I'm sorry to report that we don't have any ultrasound pics to show this time... she did do the ultrasound, but more just to check measurements and growth of the baby. It's really too big to get any good shots right now, but we did see the head (which seems to get exponentially bigger every time) and the belly (also looks pretty big- even bigger than the head!). She said baby weighs 4 pounds, which means it's doubled from last month! I'm glad to know that actually because I feel like I've been super hungry lately (eating all the time again, including in the middle of the night) so baby must have gone through a growth spurt in the last month. Heart rate was 119 which was quite a bit lower than last time (150). She said she thinks that might be because baby's super fit since he/she's been exercising with me everyday. Ha! Low heart rate... isn't that supposed to indicate a boy? But my mom said since I'm carrying straight out in front that it must be a girl? Still sitting on pins and needles!

I asked Dr about my Braxton Hicks contractions... I'm having plenty of them... but not an alarming amount... she said she thought that was very good news- that my uterus is getting ready to do it's thing. She said that women who don't feel the contractions ahead of time tend to get to their due date but still nothing is happening. She thought my BH contractions might indicate that I would go a week or so early, which I'd be thrilled about. Partly because 9 more weeks of pregnancy sounds so much better than 10 more weeks of pregnancy... and partly because my mom is flying out from Ohio for the month of November to help, and logic would say better that the baby is here already so she actually has something to help with other than just waiting impatiently and watching me get bigger everyday. ;)

So I've graduated to the 2 week cycle of Dr visits rather than the 4 week schedule I've been on all along. That seems like progress.

The best part about these MD appointments (besides hearing that baby is all healthy and growing as expected) is that we schedule them at 11:30 so I get to go to lunch with my awesome husband after each one. That's a real treat in the middle of the week. :)

A Kick in the Ribs

This may sound funny, but it just really hit me that I'm going to have a baby. A real, living, little person. Coming out of me. Soon.

I think up until this weekend the whole thing was just too much of an abstract concept. It all happened so fast (the pregnancy) so I didn't spend tons of time before getting pregnant dreaming of having a baby and being a mom. I haven't spent a ton of time around other moms and little babies (most of my training friends don't have 'em).

Over the last 7 months I've spent lots of time reading books and internet websites and talking to people about what it's like going through pregnancy and the first year and all that. I've now personally experienced many of the pregnany issues that just about all pregnant women go through. But again, it was all still too abstract. We've had the baby shower, have most of the stuff we'll need, and are preparing the nursery, but still...

It took a good swift kick in the ribs to make it real.

I've heard other women talk about being kicked in the ribs, but it hadn't happened to me. My baby is so low that I didn't think it could even reach my ribs. All the movements I've felt have been down in my pelvic area- never really felt anything above my belly button. And the movements have really been pretty isolated. So I guess, in my imagination, my little bean was still just that, a little bean, even though my whole abdomen has been growing by the minute.

Well it's not just a little bean anymore. After I got kicked in the ribs, the whole baby rolled itself over and I felt just how big it is in there. It stretches from my ribs to my lower pelvis. I can't slouch when I'm sitting anymore because it gets squished and retaliates.

There might also be something about knowing the baby is head down (finally- it's been breech for most of the time thus far). Seems more in a launch position now which is another reality check.

I asked Scott this weekend if he was nervous at all.

"I... I... I... I... Yes."

Well that makes two of us.

Wanna Go Beach?

After seeing the hilarious video of Kelley's dog, Tila, not interested in going for a walk, I thought it would be fun to show an opposite reaction from Hoku. :)

Clearly, Hoku doesn't need much prodding and would gladly take herself to the beach if she could. In fact, Scott said that when she was a pup and he lived within walking distance to the beach, she would do just that.

This is a happy dog.

Too cool that the dog will clean garbage out of the ocean when given the chance. Good girl, Hoku!

My goal at the beach yesterday was to get in a deep water ocean run. 30 minutes. There happened to be a pretty good wind swell at Kailua Beach yesterday so it was a bit challenging to get beyond the waves to water deep enough to not touch. Scott got my challenge on video tape.

Eventually I made it past the waves (sans hat) and actually had some fun during my 30 minutes. It went by faster than pool running as ocean running in conditions like that is more comparable to trail running. And the whole time my husband and dog had a blast playing in the waves. At one point Scott came out to try running with me. He lasted about 10 seconds and then found it more fun to body surf the waves so that was the end of that. He probably had the right idea!

We got a beach belly shot. This is almost 30 weeks. I think it's pretty obvious how low I'm carrying. Baby boy? Hmmm?

What a difference 10 weeks makes. This is what I looked like at 20 weeks. And I thought I was so big and obviously pregnant. Ha.
10 more weeks to go!